Thursday 3 September 2015

Bush Issues

You know how it is 
When you want to go for a swim
You look down below....
and the bush needs a trim

You think to yourself
Would this look ok?
If I tucked it all in ...
Or would hair start to stray


With each movement I made
To get into the pool
If I put on some board shorts

Do you think I could fool


The hirsute swimmer's friend
Other swimmers in thinking
I was a surf chick?
If I had a quick shave
There's a risk I might nick

That delicate skin
And come out in a rash
And I'd rather have hair
Than spots round my gash

If pull down the front
Do you think it might hide 
My topiary? But if I go down the slide....
It will ride up and show I'm too busy relaxing

Than to spend my time plucking and shaving and waxing

And then I see blokes

With their big hairy guts
All covered in pubes from their throats to their nuts
Who don't need to be shaved
Yet when it comes to my bits
They must be so carefully managed 

And it's....

Very unfair and a little bit weird
That my foof must be covered
But not a man's beard!


The filter gets clogged
With the hair from their backs
The pool would be cleaner
If men all got waxed!


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